If Only

Others have lives that unfold
Mines on hold, incarcerated
Cannot flee the doubt within
Flayer of positivity

Too few words for poetry
All emotion lost, soul rotten
Hope eludes me in this despair
No where for faith to live

If a choice should come again
To have a life, some fun
Would I have the will within
To break my bonds and take it?

Or will this misery last
Scraping heart, ritualistically
The regret of lost opportunity prolonged
Chances lost—Oh Incredulity!

To sit here alone
Living lost lives, if onlys
Tinting rose what could have been
The madness that swallows

Can there be another chance?
Or will folly come, false friend
Casting aside gifts from life
Cementing fractal lies


​