| Nick Crutchley |
|
Welcome to my journal. Here find stories and poetry, posts about my life and wanderings, and musings about the environment and mental health.
I wish you well on your own journey. Nick Crutchley
Categories
 Others have lives that unfold Mines on hold, incarcerated Cannot flee the doubt within Flayer of positivity  I see only dreams, nightmares Forever twisted, unholy A fever of unspoken frenzy A straight jacket of thought And memories  A poison arrow pierced me
Festering anger turned to hate For decades it sat there Pulsing ill will  I escaped the city as a thief
Armed with wit and guile Only to steal no peace of mind As barefoot I ran 
Holograms paint sex in vivid light. Atop skyscrapers, heartthrobs, either silky smooth or rugged, sell watches, aftershave and cosmetic implants. Pouting supermodels jut from buildings like gargoyles, and aerial drones project hunky gods and curvaceous goddesses into the sky. Sex empowers women, we pretend, while making men drooling dogs. And men are dogs, salivating for bitches in heat. Wherever they look breasts protrude and parted lips offer a silent promise. No wonder they merge with Psychnet porn: their wives cannot live up to the dream we force-feed them.  She’s lead Transmuted into gold through love Our heart Bound deep but forever apart Our loneliness echoes in each other’s soul Yet we never speak, and angels weep 
Sea crashes plastic
Fish mercury fed Temperature taken Gaia infected Infested! Humankind spreads 
Mandy stares at the toxic sky. Nearby, a boy picks his way through robot, android and cyborg junk. As she lies naked and half-buried in the undulating ocean of alloys and plastic and human bones, where cheap but expensive to recycle machines and people are sent, she remains silent, motionless, expressionless. Perhaps the child will find something else of value before reaching her, and scavenge it instead?  Doubt dominates belief Self against self Shadow obscuring positive intention And all paths become blocked by the one who says ‘Can’t’ while the other fights, ‘Can!’ But the fight, soon lost, leaves only inaction a decision feared, never made, absconded Can I? No. Should I? No. Why not? You cannot win, see, you’re nobody, no one; who do you think you are? No one? Yes. No one . . . But we engage in conversation I let doubt seep in Friendly, I offer kindness And doubt dissipates Hopefully |
